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.There have been quite a few things swirling in my head that I just haven't felt compelled to write about. For those of you who have read John's latest post, you know that he lost his job. There were feelings and thoughts that I had on the matter when he first found out, but I didn't feel it was my place to bring the issue up before he did. And really, I don't even know what I would have said anyway.
.So here I sit with life issues happening around me and no real desire to talk them out. This is
soo unlike me.
.
Even now I find it hard to write. I can't tell you how many times I have backspaced and deleted before writing this paragraph. Nothing seems right. I want to be honest about where I am and what is going on inside of me but I guess I'm feeling too disconnected to express them. I think now I fully understand what John must feel like when he is in the midst of processing things. Usually, I am so in tune with my emotions and thoughts and can share them quite easily. I sometimes get frustrated with John when I know he is processing things but can't tell me what those feelings or thoughts are. Another day in his shoes I guess.
.
I can say that I am excited about the journey he's on. God seems to be doing some cool things inside of him during this time. Neither of us know what God has in store, but those who have been praying for us seem to be excited about the outcome. I really do trust that God is preparing us for something great.
.
Honestly, it's not the outcome that scares me - it's the journey there.
shawanda
10:08 AM
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